5 Reasons Why Winter In NYC Is Better Than Summer In NYC

Actually, classic New York character Thong Guy is more of a reason to CELEBRATE summer. (Photo from Gothamist's Thong Guy Archive)

As we slip out of the icy embrace of the Polar Vortex, you may notice it's still pretty cold out there, and it will be for months to come. So we'd like to deliver a gentle reminder that this chilled atmosphere is much more enjoyable than a hot, humid, smelly summer day in the streets of New York City.

The kind of day where the sweat covers every part of you like a new layer of skin, further warming your overall body temperature. You can't seem to cool off, no matter how many dehydrating beers you drink, which, incidentally, are expanding your bathing suit waistline. The sweat has even somehow moved past your typically impenetrable eyebrow barrier, stinging your eyeballs. You're blinded by the sweat, by the heat, by the hot hot sun. You're walking in a stupor like some dazed-out, waterlogged version of your alert Winter Self. And just a few steps will bring you from Glowing to Drenched. Up ahead, is that the guy you have a crush on or just a mirage, or maybe that's an oncoming truck? Better duck inside this non-air conditioned bodega just in case it is him, your hair is all frizzy and your bangs have now separated into dewy strands, each storing an almost admirable amount of your forehead sweat. Oh great, you just stepped in a pile of melting garbage. No one will ever love you like this.

So let's celebrate winter... by remembering all of the reasons summer here can kind of suck.

Sweating On The Platform

It can get to be over 90 degrees on the subway platforms in the summer, which—aside from oncoming subway wind—offers no relief in the way of a cool breeze. You are just stuck down there in a pressure cooker situation until whenever your train decides to show up. But then again sometimes it's SO hot outside that it's actually cooler on the platforms. Can't win!

Actually, Everything About The Subway

Photo via specialkrb

It's so crowded and your head is nestled into the nook of where this stranger's arm and torso meet and oh god why isn't anyone wearing deodorant and look a seat's available and now your bare legs can stick to the surface of it as your skin absorbs the bacteria of other people. Next time just get on the empty non-air conditioned car.

Your Con Ed Bill

Experimental lab test of new central air conditioning unit. July 1945. (LIFE)

Running your air conditioner in the summer can be a necessary evil, especially for those in apartments without a nice, natural cross breeze. So your Con Ed bill will go up in the summer... unless you want to develop a series of solutions that will sort of cool you down, like sticking your sheets in the freezer for hours before trying to sleep in your sweatbox of an apartment.

Speaking of air conditioners, they drip, and you will get hit by a minimum of 20 drops of "city juice" per week of summer, which probably won't kill you... but a falling air conditioner could.

Smelly Trash Bags Stacked On The Sidewalk

Photo via Bitchcakes

Garbage smells worse in the summer than any other season. In the winter you can't even smell the garbage that's stacked up on the sidewalk. Go out there and inhale... all you'll get is a cleansing, invigorating feeling. It's only summer garbage that smells. That's just science.

Crime Is Up!

Photo via hernanhernandez

You are more likely to fall victim to a crime in the hot, summer months.